A Small (not TALL) Tale about a Chicken
I remember reading about the story I am about to tell you. I can’t quite remember when or where I first came across the adventures of this exceptional chicken, but I never forgot her. She has to be one of the most extraordinary chickens that ever was.
The story began a long time ago; I am not sure exactly when. The students at Harvard College were accepting nominations for class president. As always, ambitious young people threw their hats in the ring. After all, what looks better on a resume than being president of your class at a place like Harvard?
A few students were thoughtful about the process; perhaps overthinking a bit. One night, I imagine after a few cocktails, they looked over the rule book that governs how one runs for class president. These clever, enterprising individuals found a couple interesting things. First, nothing states that a candidate for president of any Harvard class must be a student at Harvard. Obviously, an oversight to be exploited. And second, nothing in the book says that a candidate needs to be human. And there you have it.
A group of exceptional students, ones apparently with a light course load, set out to create a bit of chaos. They quickly found a “psychic chicken” and nominated her for class president. Of course, the chicken won in a landslide. One failed candidate, i.e., a human Harvard student who lost to the chicken, got his father, a Wall Street lawyer, to raise a big ruckus. Lawsuits flew across the campus in an attempt to throw out the election results. As far as I can tell, the “psychic chicken” did not see any of this coming.
I wish I had a resolution to this story. I have been searching for this incident, and I can’t find any proof that it ever happened. I was reasonably sure that I read about this in Harvard Magazine, a publication sent to my mailbox every month. I went online and searched the back catalog. Much to my disappointment, the phrase “psychic chicken” did not appear. I also did a more considerable search of the entire internet, and I could not find it. It won’t surprise you to learn that Google Scholar also came up empty. I am at a loss. I am confident I read about it, and the reporting was accurate. This story did not come from The Harvard Lampoon.
As it stands, if you come across a story with a chicken, psychic or not, winning an election for class president at any university, not just Harvard, please let me know. I have long wondered what became of the gifted and ambitious Harvard chicken. It would be nice to see if she had any kindred spirits out there. You know, chickens with fire in their bellies who, like many politicians, longed to be in the arena.
